Avoiding the “Right” Guy

First off, don’t tell guys what your looking for in a person, or what you imagine your dream guy to be like.

     I knew a woman who was completely baffled that the man she was now living with, had a different personality then when she started dating him. Easy… she told him up front exactly what kind of man she wanted. This gave him the opportunity to act out the character until he got what he wanted from her.

 

Now a guy trying to get you to like them, is most likely going to act the complete opposite of his actual personality. However, you will get a chance to see what he actually thinks about you. If he tries to impress you with his colorful vocab and level of experience, then he thinks that’s what you want. If he’s trying to impress you with his resume, paychecks, and expensive car, then that’s what he thinks you want. 

If a guy asks what kind of guy you like/what you want from one, just give a celebrity answer. ‘You know it really depends on the individual, I don’t have a specific type’. Be careful about saying what you want, example: Companionship equals husband, Fun equals fling. Saying I don’t know works well too. Don’t lie, just don’t let him misunderstand you. You may be looking for a husband, but do you know if he’s The One, probably not, so don’t say your looking for a committed relationship because he will think your talking about him, even if that’s not at all what your thinking.

  Example:

                 I say: I think it would be fun to get married on Mt. Kilimanjaro

                  He hears: I want to marry you on Mt. Kilimanjaro

                  I say: I might be able to have four kids at most

                 He hears: I want you to be the father of my four children

That’s just to illustrate my point. I’m not sure if guys even know they do it. This is not to just play games. It’s so you can find out about the guy in an unbiased way. It’s way funner getting to know the person they are, instead of the person they think you want them to be. It also protects you from con-artists. If they don’t know what you want, they can’t play with your emotions. In the end, you’ll find the best match, not the best actor.

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This entry was posted in Dating, emotions, relationships, Uncategorized, What your looking for in a partner and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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