Can Music Alter Your Relationship?


There is much debate surrounding musics ability to change one’s personality. Do you pick your music based on your personality? Or, does music change your personality, which then affects which music you pick? There are many who believe that music does not affect them. However, I think most people agree that you are what you eat. And even if your mood decides your meal, that meal will still affect you back. I think you pick your music like you pick your food. The choice is up to you, and your wants, mood, and personality. But, music/food will affect you, and your wants, mood, and personality, after consumption.

Studies have proven that a dose of music can affect you in the short run. So, they concluded that music has no long term effects. However, how many of us only listen to a dose of music? Music is consumed on a daily basis, if not hourly. So couldn’t long term consumption, affect a person in the long run? Besides, one choice in the short run, can affect you in the long run. So even if it only affects you in the short run, there could still be long term repercussions.

This is why I think the music you listen to, is important to your overall well being. Now, one song might not do much, but when you know every word, to every song, on a cd, it could start affecting you just as much as your diet. Some of the most vulnerable to musics’ effects, are kids. As a result, one of my musical concerns is Taylor Swift. Just to clear things up, I’m not necessarily talking about her. I don’t know her. I’m talking about her image, what is represented through her, and its effects. The next puzzlement I get is that people think she’s the ‘good’ one. She’s currently the nice little wholesome girl who does things right. She might have a good heart, have good intentions, and genuinely care about others, and at the same time be blatantly wrong about good, healthy, relationships.

I do like her songs, but I think it’s unwise to hear them frequently. If you had her cd on repeat, you would probably start feeling upset, lonely, and it would make you miss someone from a very bad/unhealthy relationship. Unfortunately, she promotes jerks. She subsequently portrays respectable gentlemen as boring. Now, you shouldn’t date someone who is nice, but bores you, just as much as you shouldn’t date someone who is a jerk, but thrills you. Either one is a recipe for disaster. I don’t want younger girls meditating on her songs, because I don’t want them following in her relationship footprints. I mean, she had already dated Gyllenhaal and Mayer by the time she was 19! They’re what, in they’re 30’s? I think Gyllenhaal was 29, only a decade older, but in what world is that fair? Honestly, what 19 year old girl would stand a chance if Jake Gyllenhaal had access to them? … none come to mind. Which is why they make laws about this stuff. It’s barely legal, let alone ethical.

The one guy I think might have been a gentleman, was Lautner. But, she pushed him away. This is typical of girls with low self esteem. When they meet a great guy, they don’t think they’re enough for them. They break it off because they think once the guy realizes the girl is not good enough for them, they’ll break up anyways. So, they beat them to the punch.

Now, however, she continues to sing ‘you look like bad news, I have to have you’ (from her song 22). The problem is not with her singing about all her crazy, dysfunctional, and very painful situations. The problem is people think she’s a good girl, and that’s how they behave.

Good, is not singing that in the future, you can see the person who hurt you, pathetic, drunk, alone, and ranting about the same old bitter things (from the song mean). That’s a terrible lesson to teach young girls. Good, is hoping the person who hurt you, gets helped, stops hurting people, stops hurting themselves, and can have a good life by doing good things.You might not want to ever have a relationship with them, (totally fine), but you shouldn’t hope they suffer pain and misfortune for the rest of their lives. Or her song, ‘Better than Revenge’, teaches girls to hate/blame the girl your guy cheated with. First problem, why are you with a cheater? Second problem, why is this not his fault, but the girls? She sidetracks from the main issue, (bad relationship), and attacks a symptom, (the girl).

I hope her underlying messages change in the future. Kelly Clarkson has definitely done so from, ‘My Life would Suck without You’, to ‘Mr. Know it All’, to ‘What doesn’t kill You’, to ‘Catching my Breath’. She moved away from troubled relationships to loving/living life in a healthy way. So I’m rooting that she’ll turn around too, and not repeat the pattern by taking her pain out on younger/inexperienced boys. I’m also hoping people realize she’s still just a kid who’s been through a lot, and shouldn’t be followed when it comes to relationship advice. Love should not mean pain. It should build you up, not tear you down. Again, I don’t know her, but who does? Not many. So I can only analyze what she promotes, and the effects of her music on millions of young relationships. I don’t know, but that much consumption could have a bit of an impact.

Good Luck out there

This entry was posted in advice, best years, Dating, emotions, health, music, relationships, What your looking for in a partner, your life and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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