I’m sure almost everyone knows the song Grenade, by Bruno Mars. No matter his intentions, the song portrays a very unhealthy message. I think I perceive songs differently than most girls because I can’t understand how it is seen as romantic. My friend was explaining how great he was, and how sweet the song was, much to my confusion. So I gave her an example, because I could see my argument was falling on deaf ears.
‘Do you remember your ex – so and so?’ Ex – so and so was a mean person. They were controlling, backstabbing, and in no way respected my friend. Being with so and so, got her into bad/dangerous situations. When she snapped and stopped letting him treat her poorly, he became clingy, emotional, and refused to let her move on to a healthy and happy life. When she wouldn’t let him mess with her head/emotions, he then started going to her friends and getting sympathy from them.
He continued to cause damage in her life, even after she cut him off. I stated, ‘Imagine if he sang the song about you.’ At this her face changed to a look of disgust. She knew her ex had been saying the same things about her, that Bruno Mars was saying about the girl. The song was tarnished.
The lyrics are what abusers say. After demeaning, belittling, attacking, and treating a person as completely and utterly worthless, they then start getting people to hate the person. They do this by saying things like, ‘I gave her all my love and she tossed it in the trash, or if my body was on fire she’d watch me burn down in flames, or she say’s she loves me but she’s a liar cause she never did, or she beat me till I was numb, I told her tell the devil I said ‘hey’ when she gets back from where she’s from, or mad woman, bad woman, that’s just what she is, she’ll smile to my face then rip the brakes out my car…..
This is the woman he loves? He’s saying the meanest possible things about her. This is something you’d say about a person you hate and despise. Oh, but abusers don’t just stop at destroying your reputation to the whole world. They also have to paint themselves out to be the hero. This would be accomplished by saying things like, ‘I’d jump in front of a train for you, I’d catch a grenade for you, take a bullet straight through my brain, throw my hand on a blade…’ He would DIE for her. How noble of him to die for that mean, nasty, horrible, abusive, lying, bitch he’s with? Wait, now I’m confused. Why would he die to help the devil? Isn’t that what evil people do?
‘But all he asked was for her to give him all her love’. Well, no person has the right to ask this of another human. This is the type of thing psychos/stalkers say. They’re like, ‘I just want you to love me, and if you don’t, look at what I will do/say about you.
Now, most people thought I was exaggerating, or thought this may happen, but He is the good one. They were able to hold this argument, that is until the music video came out. The music video paints the picture of the girl who was actually able to get away from the guy. She was able to be happy in a new relationship. So, what did he do? He committed suicide and blamed it on her.
That’s utter and complete selfishness. Mr. I would do anything for you, is again trying to hurt her, this time using guilt. He in no way cared what pain he might inflict on others, it was just all about him. This is what psychos do. ‘If you try to leave me, I will kill myself’. People like this will move onto killing their partners as well (Safe Haven).
Maybe you’ve been lucky enough to have never had to deal with people like this, or maybe your unaware of it. Anyways, no matter how you slice it, this song is the farthest thing from sweet and romantic. Don’t let abusers get away with destroying others reputations, getting sympathy, and looking like heroes. Hopefully this will alter your perception of the song, or just give you something to ponder.
Oh and I don’t know Bruno Mars. This is just what’s being represented, not about him personally.
Good Luck out there