2014-10-09-19-17-17Has anyone noticed Maroon 5 has gotten a little, um, troubled, recently. He’s never exactly been the most wholesome, but that’s nothing to stop the press for. His last two music videos, in particular, are disturbing to say the least.

Let me break it down though. First, the song Maps …

“I miss the taste of the sweeter life” okay so you and this girl had a good relationship, got it.

“I was there for you in your darkest times” Alright so he was awesome in the relationship, really supportive of her.

“We drew a map to a better place, but on that road I took a fall, Oh baby why did you run away?” Wait, what happened, does “fall” mean you cheated? just got neglectful of the relationship? picked up a bad habit? were rude to her? But that is why she left, right?

“But I wonder where were you? When I was at my worst down on my knees?” You just said she left when you “took a fall”

“All the roads you took came back to me, so I’m following the map that leads to you” So, now your stalking her? I thought she left you, and apparently didn’t leave a phone number or email…

Anyways, if you supported a person during a relationship, and then they turned their back on you when you needed them, then why do you want to get back with them? Makes absolutely no sense. Of course he cheats on her in the music video. I’m assuming this is the “fall”. Then she dies from running into the street, after almost being sexually attacked by some street thug. It’s a disturbing video, more like horror, than romance. See, don’t run away from a cheating boyfriend, or you’ll be attacked before getting run over by a car…

That’s when I start to wonder where the band came up with this morbid idea. Of course, it’s portrayed to feel sorry for the poor guy who was seduced by another woman, and then poor him, his girlfriend dies. Who shows their girlfriend dying some gorry tragic death in a music video? I digress, anyways, he didn’t seem like he would have too hard of a time finding another girlfriend, he was having a pretty fun time at the party before she interrupted.

Still, this is all too common, not pleasant, but nothing compared to his new song Animal. Where to begin…

How about the first lyric,

“I’m preying on you tonight, hunt you down, eat you alive”

This is also a tie into his lyrical video. There are snakes hunting a cute rabbit. For the record, Maroon 5 is talking about a human relationship. Did you ever notice snakes don’t have sex with bunnies. That’s because snakes and bunnies don’t have relationships. Just like wolves don’t eat their mates. So unless your talking about Maroon 5 going down on a cow, then you should Not be talking about two humans in a relationship. Right? Snake-Bunny = blood. Wolf – Wolf = no blood. So logically, human – human = no blood. Only human – cow, or human – chicken, would equal blood. That’s why the excuse of “were all just animals, so dont get offended” doesn’t hold. If the “we are all animals” theory is to hold an argument, then he would have to say she is a sub-species, not an equal, but beneath him, which means she’s not even human, below human, like a pig. Hence, why a woman, or anyone for that matter, who has been trying to reduce violence and inequality between the sexes, would be mad. The girl has become a piece of meat at the Butchers, not a human equal to him, since we have established that a human – human relationship would not include blood, just like a snake – snake relationship would not. Alright, I think I’ve made my point.

Well, I was going to copy/paste lyrics, but it would practically be the whole song, so snipets… “think you can hide, I can smell you from miles” “I love your lies, I eat em up, but don’t deny the animal that comes alive when I’m inside of you”

So she’s trying to get away. And she’s telling you she doesn’t want sex, and you go oh your so cute, I love your lies, but I know you really actually want to have sex with me, so I’m going to hunt you down and get it. To quickly summarize the music video, Adam is a full blown, out of his mind serial stalker. Not just like watch you through your bedroom window (he does that a lot too) but like break into your bedroom while your sleeping, and lay with you type stalker. He’s fantasizing about erotic sex, swinging on a dead carcass while dreaming about her, and he enjoys his fantasies with gallons of blood. Oh, but I’ve heard most butcher’s are like this?? I feel sorry for butcher’s now – terrible connotation. I could go at this all day, instead I’ve decided to pull out some real comments from the music video and break down the points. Up first is..

“Geo Rader
3 days ago · Shared publicly

To all those people hating and whining there are far worse things in the world in a video clip it is a song called animals what would expect him singing about cute fluffy bunnies the stalking yes May be bad but there is no thing like rape and it perhaps wasn’t blood rain maybe it was wine studies show most people will always ALWAYS look for a negative in someone or something before all else and guess what it’s not rape he managed to get the love of his life to love him and working out a little never hurt anyone many people train on pig meat mostly boxers because it is the closest thing to a human and reproduction never hurt anyone basically you guys are saying ok he loves her she loves him they can’t kiss or reproduce learn to have a heart it’s just a video if it were real life it would matter but it’s not so learn not to be a burt hole and get a life it’s a good song SONG it’s a song with a video that’s it ok. (End rant”

“Far worse things in the world” .. so if I saw a child being attacked by bullies, I should go, don’t interfere, there are far worse things going on in the world? How about an elderly lady trying to open a door on a frozen windy day? Oh no, I’ll just watch her struggle because there are far worse things going on in the world. Selfish old lady, jeez what’s wrong with people for trying to improve things (say having the top teen artists reprimanded for Glamorizing rape, stalking, erotic fantasies). Bad individuals, bad, don’t try to improve society for just the small things.

This leads into the next point. Rape. What part of she’s lying when she says she doesn’t want me, so I’m going to go ahead and have sex with her anyways, is not Rape? I’m just going to assume that anyone smart enough to use the internet doesn’t need a further explanation. Of course if you need one later, just let me know. Moving on.

Wine? Wine!? To quote the commentor directly “it is a song called animals what would expect him singing about” Yes I’m sure… it’s actually wine they’re pouring on him, I mean, who wouldn’t jump to that conclusion. However, they make an interesting point. Even the people seriously trying to defend the song, know the blood is gross, nasty, and disturbing, so maybe it’s just wine….
Moving on

Maybe you’re right, “people always ALWAYS look for a negative in someone or something “. This is why instead of focusing on the positives of the song, and how much you liked it, you chose to focus on the ‘negative’ comments, and argue with them. Point well taken. Moving on…

Funny, I didn’t hear any posters complaining about him exercising, as you are suggesting, and yes boxers may use frozen meat to practice, however, they are not rubbing up on them, while having sexual fantasies about a girl. Just so wrong… moving on.

The commentor also stated, they (Adam and girl in video) can’t kiss or reproduce without people getting mad? As well, you say he got the love of his life. I think I realized the problem here. You didn’t actually watch the music video. That must be it, because if you saw it, you would know each scene with him having sexual type fun with the girl, Was All In His Head. Geez, really? This is why it’s such a worrisome video. The girl never got with him, and didn’t want to. He approached her at the club and she was like, ya I don’t think so. So he just kept watching her and dreaming about her, sex, blood, and frozen carcuses. How romantic.

And no, just because it’s his wife in the video, it doesn’t make it any better. She was either inspired by some 50 shades dream, or is enjoying watching his career suffer. One wonders if he got a pre-nup. Besides the fact he just pulled a Miley and bleached his hair. Is anyone else concerned for him? It may be both of them, or just one, but what woman would say “I know, you can stalk me down, and add in some gross blood sex scenes, for your next music video, then bleach your hair and that will really grow your career”. He also said he had “no explanation ” as to why he did it. I wouldn’t have thought much about it except for the video. Didn’t Amanda Bynes bleach her hair too when she really needed help. Whatever, it’s strange.

Let’s add one more.

20 hours ago

“It shouldn’t offend you its art not political”

Alrighty then, what are politicians? They are people (though that is debatable). What do political things involve? People. What are people when they are little? Children. What shapes a child into a person? Well, there are many things that influence a child. One being pop culture/ pop media. Let’s see teenage boys see “Sexiest Man Alive – Adam Levine” and go ‘what is he doing that makes him so cool’ teenage girls see ‘Sexiest Huband Alive – Adam Levine’ and go what do I need to be like to get the sexiest husband. Enter Internet. Enter Youtube. Enter “Animal”. To give an example:

“Nain K
19 hours ago · Shared publicly

I hate it when the majority are like kids and think it’s violent, creepy and disgusting. Tell me, WHERE THE HELL IN THIS VIDEO DISGUSTING?! I’m thirteen and I found this video absolutely fine.”

Now this 13 year old thinks this music video is “absolutely fine”. Why? Because who knows how much media he has consumed by all the ‘Popular’ Celebrities that he wants to be like. He has been programed to think it’s fine, even defend it. After all Adam Levine is the “Sexiest Man Alive” right? Now this 13 year old is going to contribute to the political arena. He has a vote after all. But has no ability to judge a simple music video and see the unacceptable underlying messages of Rape, Sexism, and psychos. Nope, he’s a happy naive consumer, who was not protected from these videos (exactly why people want them banned, or to at least have a warning), and who is going to be affecting the political spectrum in exactly 5 years minimum. Scary. And yes this video has everything to do with politics. Please think before you type.

Oh, and another point I saw quite frequently is “it doesn’t matter, because it’s not real”.

Not real? This type of thing happens everyday, and much much worse. I’m not talking about fantasizing either, i’m talking about people who fullfill their fantasies of murder, rape, and torture. It’s not okay to glamorize this because first, their are slightly off people who are going to meditate on it, and second, because it is so disgustingly disrespectful to all those who have survived, and to all those who knew people who didn’t. No warning, no scensoring. For all those who say parents should be monitoring what their kid watches, your simply selfish. Their are too many bad parents that won’t care to block anything. There should be a warning for youth at the minimum.

The other argument was that people watch horror movies all the time, and nobody cares about that.

First off, people do care, and Second, you have to have an ID to get into an R movie without a parent. Any kid any age, can watch these music videos by themselves, numerous times. Third, there are Ratings. Music videos don’t have any ratings, or reasons why they are rated (ex. Mild Language, Obscenity, Sexual, or Disturbing Images). You just watch them and hope the Celeb didn’t put anything too heinous in there. Even a great parent has no way to keep thier kid from watching these videos. I guess homeschooling, and no electronics.. or friends… Brilliant.

Truthfully, I’m hoping Adam’s not being drugged, or having a breakdown, or something. Hopefully, this will just be his way to bring awareness to Domestic Abuse month (October) and he’ll come out with some explanation. Hopefully.

As always, thanks for reading!

~Stay strong out there.

Posted in advice, emotions, health, music, relationships, sex, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Trains, Blades, and Automobiles, How Romantic?

I’m sure almost everyone knows the song Grenade, by Bruno Mars. No matter his intentions, the song portrays a very unhealthy message. I think I perceive songs differently than most girls because I can’t understand how it is seen as romantic. My friend was explaining how great he was, and how sweet the song was, much to my confusion. So I gave her an example, because I could see my argument was falling on deaf ears.

‘Do you remember your ex – so and so?’ Ex – so and so was a mean person. They were controlling, backstabbing, and in no way respected my friend. Being with so and so, got her into bad/dangerous situations. When she snapped and stopped letting him treat her poorly, he became clingy, emotional, and refused to let her move on to a healthy and happy life. When she wouldn’t let him mess with her head/emotions, he then started going to her friends and getting sympathy from them.

He continued to cause damage in her life, even after she cut him off. I stated, ‘Imagine if he sang the song about you.’ At this her face changed to a look of disgust. She knew her ex had been saying the same things about her, that Bruno Mars was saying about the girl. The song was tarnished.

The lyrics are what abusers say. After demeaning, belittling, attacking, and treating a person as completely and utterly worthless, they then start getting people to hate the person. They do this by saying things like, ‘I gave her all my love and she tossed it in the trash, or if my body was on fire she’d watch me burn down in flames, or she say’s she loves me but she’s a liar cause she never did, or she beat me till I was numb, I told her tell the devil I said ‘hey’ when she gets back from where she’s from, or mad woman, bad woman, that’s just what she is, she’ll smile to my face then rip the brakes out my car…..

This is the woman he loves? He’s saying the meanest possible things about her. This is something you’d say about a person you hate and despise. Oh, but abusers don’t just stop at destroying your reputation to the whole world. They also have to paint themselves out to be the hero. This would be accomplished by saying things like, ‘I’d jump in front of a train for you, I’d catch a grenade for you, take a bullet straight through my brain, throw my hand on a blade…’ He would DIE for her. How noble of him to die for that mean, nasty, horrible, abusive, lying, bitch he’s with? Wait, now I’m confused. Why would he die to help the devil? Isn’t that what evil people do?

‘But all he asked was for her to give him all her love’. Well, no person has the right to ask this of another human. This is the type of thing psychos/stalkers say. They’re like, ‘I just want you to love me, and if you don’t, look at what I will do/say about you.

Now, most people thought I was exaggerating, or thought this may happen, but He is the good one. They were able to hold this argument, that is until the music video came out. The music video paints the picture of the girl who was actually able to get away from the guy. She was able to be happy in a new relationship. So, what did he do? He committed suicide and blamed it on her.

That’s utter and complete selfishness. Mr. I would do anything for you, is again trying to hurt her, this time using guilt. He in no way cared what pain he might inflict on others, it was just all about him. This is what psychos do. ‘If you try to leave me, I will kill myself’. People like this will move onto killing their partners as well (Safe Haven).

Maybe you’ve been lucky enough to have never had to deal with people like this, or maybe your unaware of it. Anyways, no matter how you slice it, this song is the farthest thing from sweet and romantic. Don’t let abusers get away with destroying others reputations, getting sympathy, and looking like heroes. Hopefully this will alter your perception of the song, or just give you something to ponder.

Oh and I don’t know Bruno Mars. This is just what’s being represented, not about him personally.

Good Luck out there

Posted in advice, best years, Bruno Mars, Dating, guilt, health, music, relationships, your life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Forget the Apple, Give em Candy: academic survival tips


1) Saving some money: One semester I needed 13 books. These books generally run from $50 – $200. So I could have easily been spending over a grand for these. Ya, no thank you. To avoid this, I checked the school library. The library became my bank accounts best friend. Either in the current edition or a slightly older one, I managed to get all 13 books. Most college kids don’t have a lot of extra cash piled around, so I really loved discovering this. Even if they don’t have the book on the shelf, ask the librarian/look on their computer database, and see if you can get it ordered in. I did this a few times as well. Over a few years, this at least saved me a couple grand, not to mention the awesome feeling of walking around with free books. Well, their free if you minus the thousands in tuition.

2) Scheduling: Take interim/condensed courses. I found this out when I was a sophomore. I took one class that was half a semester. Oh and your advisers won’t tell you about these classes, just look them up in the course catalog. Anyways, when I finished the class half way through, I got this boost of energy to finish my other classes. Normally, students are run down by the end of the semester. The problem with that is most of the grade depends on the last week of class. I don’t know why this gives you a boost, but it works.

However, the best condensed courses are week long courses. Brutal, I know. I didn’t know if I was going to survive my first one, but I did. And I discovered, though boring, they are way easier than semester long courses. The professors have to cut their content/assignments/tests in half if not more. There is way less material, and you are given way more slack by the (also tired) professor. When they say 8am – 5pm, that’s typically not the case either. Most of the condensed one’s I took would end around noon, even if they were supposed to go all day.

The professors who braved it out the whole day, had us watch movies, or work on projects. They just can’t talk that long. The absolute best part is finishing 3 credits in a week. You could take 8 of these classes over two months of summer, and finish a years worth of credits. They’ll have them over spring break and winter break too. I found this to be one way that the school passed through it’s ‘favorite’ students. The classes would be full of the schools athletes, politicians, and kids from prestigious groups/clubs.

3) Exceptions: I said I’d talk about this in my last post, so it’s partly explained there. Anyways, there are tons of reasons that students need exceptions. You might need A class before you can take B class. But, taking them in this order will put you behind. Or, you might need 21 credits (when you add in those extra interim courses), and your only allowed to take 18. Or a specific course isn’t available,(could just be for a semester), and you want/need to take it now. Or… From financials, to scheduling, to registration, the school can make exceptions for anything. You just have to tell them what you want done. Example: I’ve heard a million and one professors say if you miss a test, you’ll get a zero and there are absolutely no exceptions. Test day comes, and someone always misses. I never saw an instance where the professor didn’t let the student retake the test. By the time I was a senior, professors would say ‘this is how it’s done, end of story’, and no one really believed them.

Side note: it won’t help a student if they just start lying. You have to have a valid reason (as simple as, ‘I want to graduate earlier), and then they look at the rules more like guidelines.

Good Luck out there

Posted in Academics, advice, best years, classroom, college, GPA, Professors, Uncategorized, your life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Road Less Traveled

door of possibilities

Help yourself out by not listening to your academic adviser. Well, not solely anyways. Think of them, as well, an adviser. They give you advice, advice that is considered. They’re not a personal manager, they just get paid/keep their job, depending on how many students are going to the school. So they will probably want you to stay, a long time.

I was a year away from graduating when I went into the advisers office to talk over a different degree emphasis. After discussing that I was interested in the new emphasis, because some of my current classes, were quite frankly, boring, I was advised to change my entire degree. I think a few gen ed classes would have transferred but nothing else. It would have put me back at freshman standing. On top of switching me into the hardest department on campus, it was 110% the wrong field for me. Now, why do people think kids go through college and change majors 18 times? Well, that’s what their adviser/professors/parents told them. They say, if you are not really enjoying your classes, then you need to switch into a major where your classes are fun and enjoyable. They say, it may take you a year, or two, or three extra, but it’s worth it in the long run. I saw a system emerge as I watched my fellow students get trapped as eternal freshman.

Freshman classes are some of the hardest classes you can take. They take up a huge amount of time, there’s more homework, tests, and projects. Plus tons of group assignments. But most of all, the classes are designed to be the most demanding. Then you hit sophomore classes. Sophomore classes might not be the hardest classes, but the specific combination that kids are given, makes them near impossible to choke down. I think first semester I listened to an adviser. And then a week into that semester I went on my own and changed two of my classes. I didn’t really use advisers again except to get exceptions (I’ll talk about that later). This is how I got to see the difference between personal planning and letting an adviser choose.

Courses are set up so that you need A before you can take B, and B before you can take C, and C before you can take D. But this is for 8 semesters/4 years of college courses. Thus, the seniors I was in class with, who had been listening to their advisers, had say 15 credits left. But those 15 credits were going to take a year and a half to complete because they all built off each other. The adviser would say, gee, why didn’t you already take that class. You were supposed to take that when you were a freshman. And the student would respond, I’ve just been taking the classes you told me to take.

There might be some very nice advisers, but don’t base your degree off what they are saying. You’ll be the only one hurt by their planning failures. That was a long sidetrack, but my point is students listen to their advisers when planning their schedule. I didn’t, so I set up my years of class schedule based on common sense. The other students didn’t fair so well. And this is why sophomore year is the worst. After very hard and challenging freshman classes, students are scheduled 5 of the hardest, toughest, uninteresting, complex classes that you have to take throughout your degree. It hits students so hard, that they question what major they want to be in. Then, the adviser quickly pushes them back to freshmen in another degree program. A year later, the same thing happens, and the adviser does the same thing. Parents, teachers, and advisers all say if your not enjoying your classes, then your in the wrong degree.

Round and round the cycle goes till they’ve been a on-off again freshman, sophomore, for years. At this point, they are truly convinced there is something wrong with them. Why can’t I figure out what I want to do? Why is nothing enjoyable? What’s wrong with me that my classes are so hard? To counteract the plummeting self esteem, they are getting mounds of student debt. Not fun. So, don’t change your major. Get your degree and get out. The advisers speech to me had no effect 1) because the other degree sounded awful, and 2) because I was already working in that career field and loved it. When everyone says you need to enjoy your classes to enjoy that career field, don’t buy it.

If you still think your degree is the wrong fit, but changing will push you back, I still think you should just finish. There are so many jobs that don’t care what degree you had, just that you got one. If you have figured out what you want to really do, great. Get a minor in it. I added minors and multiple areas of emphasis to my major, without having to take extra credits, and now I can qualify for multiple career fields. Most people will never know what job they will love until they get out of school. But, once out, there are limitless doors that can open for you. The world is your playground. And there are really incredible opportunities waiting for those who are willing to find them.

Good Luck out there!

Posted in Academics, advice, best years, careers, classroom, college, emotions, Professors, your life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Can You Handle the Truth? The reality of ‘Safe Haven’


(some spoilers for ‘Safe Haven’)

“People always do things for their self best interest”. The professor continued, “every decision everyone makes is driven by self interest”. I glanced around at the other students faces, some agreeing, some disinterested, and some texting. The professor continued to lecture on as I tentatively raised my hand.

“Yes?” she said with slight interest and uncertainty. I took a breath.
“Aren’t there people who do things that are not in their best self interest, even though they know they are not in their best self interest?”
“No, everyone does things only for themselves.”
“But, there are certain situations where people will hurt others or themselves, and it’s not for their benefit”.
“Okay, well I’m talking about normal people, not psychopaths”.

At this the class started laughing. I saw this happen time and time again through multiple classes. When teachers would say psychopath, the class would start chuckling much to my confusion, concern, and annoyance.

After watching ‘Safe Haven’, I wasn’t sure how to progress with such a sensitive topic. But after reading about the recent events with Oscar Pistorius, I figured not saying anything isn’t helping either.

When people think of psychopaths they think crazy and out of their mind. Which is true, but they also think the crazy is visible on the outside. It’s not. Though, ‘Safe Haven’ had some good points, the man in it was not a psychopath. He was sloppy. Psychopaths are not. Often, the first time anyone questions their saintness is when the cops are bringing out body bags. Psychopaths are those with stellar reputations, top awards, and seen as having a great life.

Reality, however, is not talked about. People believe that the four women who die every day from domestic abuse, knew what was coming. That it was in some way obvious, and therefore the woman’s fault. “There are shelters for that stuff” one of my brilliant professor stated, “there are no excuses why any women is in an abusive relationship”.

So, where is the line? At what point are they supposed to ‘know’ and leave? You don’t meet these people and they just start screaming at you. They wouldn’t be in the relationship if they knew what was coming when they met them. A lot of women draw the line of ‘if he hits me’. However, there are many situations where the first strike ends a life. Psychopaths cover their tracks, they often don’t leave marks on the person, or their partner would have some evidence against them. Other women don’t even know their being hurt. Their distraught to a point where they don’t feel it.

‘Oh, you would just know’, people say. You can spot them, but not through any method that people think. Match their words to their actions. They lie. Typically, the only person who sees their true colors, is the spouse. Kids can be brought into it too, if their younger, or if they stand up for the abused. To everyone else, they are amazing people, talented, extraordinary, just the nicest man you’ll ever meet. This is the other problem with ‘Safe Haven’. He never turned anyone against her. In reality, that’s their specialty.

Medicated, Intoxication, delusional, crazy, evil, cruel, uncaring, hateful, spiteful, stupid, sick, slut, judgmental, self righteous, controlling, bad parent, bad spouse, manipulative, abusive… Sociopaths will use whatever works to turn everyone against their partner, and if necessary, their kids too. In real life, these people can get others to hate the person they want destroyed. People will do illegal and unethical things to help them. Then, having already broken the law for the person, they’ll do anything to prove that they were right.

The women, who are the only ones dealing with the persons true self, will have everyone they know treating them like the words mentioned above. Often, their spouses will move the family to a new state, so they are instantly disliked by all new people they meet. Then, yes, they start to look a little crazy. People can’t handle that kind of pressure.

In real life, the neighbor wouldn’t have helped her. She would have handed her over to him. In real life, she wouldn’t have been able to get a job. She would have had to go through a service/shelter. If she had managed to get it, once he found where she worked, he would have gotten her fired, but without her knowing he was involved. In real life, when she confronted him, he would have shot her. Which is why the ending troubles me, because it lets women think they can go home and confront their abuser. That’s how you end up with a Pistorius situation.

One of the biggest dangers is people’s false definition of psychopath. According to wikipedia:
“Psychopathy – is a personality disorder that has been variously characterized by shallow emotions (including reduced fear, a lack of empathy, and stress tolerance), coldheartedness, egocentricity, superficial charm, manipulativeness, irresponsibility, impulsivity, criminality, antisocial behavior, a lack of remorse, and a parasitic lifestyle. However, there is no consensus about the symptom criteria and there are ongoing debates regarding issues such as essential features, causes, and the possibility of treatment”

By being charming and manipulative, people can’t imagine the things they are willing and able to do. They think they know them, or they ignore the problems they see. If a person is telling you their spouse/child is anything like the aforementioned list of words, there’s your first clue. If there saying negative things about their family, no matter how sincere/concerned they sound, that’s dangerous behavior. Look for proof, for what you’ve personally seen. Have you ever seen his wife flirting with another man, or you just think she’s cheating because she knows what Victoria Secret is.

“A lot of times people are horrified at acts “normal” people perform. Peck explains that people who do evil simply have a persona of seeming normal, but it is an act (Johnson). They can even be seen as righteous. I think many people will not believe a “normal” person is capable of committing evil. People want evil to look ugly. They don’t want a disturbed person to have an unsuspecting wife, a normal job, and barbecue with neighbors. However, Peck says truly evil people are more likely to live in your neighborhood than in a prison (Johnson).
I believe one of the most dangerous weapons a deceiver has is that people will not accept the fact that they have been manipulated and conned. They would rather keep performing evil than acknowledge that they were misled/followed someone evil. I think most people would rather die believing they are in the right, than have to change if they accept they were wrong. This perspective also explains that the people performing evil deceive themselves as well as their followers. These people believe they are justified in their actions. Often times when people “snap” those all around them say they don’t understand, they were the nicest person, and they never saw it coming. However, there are normally signs everywhere that people either ignore, or purposefully misinterpret in order to hold onto their false beliefs.
Knowing this can be helpful to prevent evil, because you understand that normal looking people are not necessarily normal people. A well rounded resume does not mean the person is stable. This can help people to stop classifying evil people as big scary and menacing, well known evil dictators, or those locked in prison. In order for people to stop corruption and deception they have to have a realistic view of evil. It’s typically people with good reputations and that seem easygoing on the surface. Truly evil people are good at what they do, and they are good at deceiving. They can be charming and seemingly sincere. Those are the truly corruptible, such as Hitler. Kellerman states that Hitler’s followers, “were mesmerized by his charisma and ideas long before realizing rewards such as money and power” (Kellerman). However, today’s “Hitler’s” are nearly invisible to those studying past tyrants. If Hitler had been born in today’s society he would not be crazily walking around attacking people. He would be leading and persuading people to do what he wanted. He might work into politics, be a CEO, or marry a person with power and connections. In today’s society he would most likely have a wife, kids, a dog, and seem passionate and idealistic. I believe those who look at him with horror today, would support him if he had been born in this generation. They would not see through his facade, his “righteous image” (Johnson), because people do not understand the true face of evil. As long as people are ignorant of it, they will be controlled by it. The way to prevent this type of evil is to look past the surface. People have to hold others to the standards of high ethical leaders. They need to judge a person’s character for traits such as honesty, accountability, integrity, compassion, faithfulness, and humility. Until leaders/followers actions and intent are scrutinized, not just their words, people will continue to be deceived by this face of evil.”

“I had no intention to kill my girlfriend,” stated Pistorius. Interesting he didn’t say he had no intention to shoot her, just not to kill her. No matter the results of Pistorius’s case, I believe psychopaths are no laughing matter.

Pistorius Case:
Psychopath Wiki

Johnson, C. E. (2011). Meeting the Ethical Challenges of Leadership: Casting Light or Shadow (4th ed., pp. 121-140). Thousand Oaks, CA: SAGE
Kellerman, B. (2004). Bad Leadership: What it is, How it Happens, Why it Matters (p. 27). Boston, MA: Harvard Business School Press.

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Grading Academics: why school is failing the class

I love learning. It’s fun, enjoyable, entertaining, and valuable. From superheroes to French bistro, there are an infinite amount of cool things to learn about.

School is not learning. School is a business. It receives money from students. The benefit from school is that it shows the world you can postpone fun things in order to get a degree. It shows you are motivated, dedicated, hard working, and resilient. But, it is not a place of learning.

“In Excellence Without a Soul, his 2006 book on the future of liberal education, Harry Lewis relates a conversation with three of his former students who had launched a highly successful Internet start-up. What in their computer-science educations had contributed to their success, Lewis wanted to know. There was an awkward silence, then one spoke up. “I really loved my computer-science education,” he said, “but I could have read books and learned a lot of that on my own. The thing that was really valuable was running the Quincy House Grill.” Lewis explains: “He’d had to get people to show up on time, and make sure there was enough hamburger ordered the day before—but not too much, or he’d have to waste it, and that would cut into his profit margin. He took all this stuff and combined it with his technical skills to become a very successful entrepreneur.”

This quote is from the article Nonstop, written in Harvard Magazine. The students in the conversation were Harvard students. It’s a great article to read, as it goes into the current undergraduate lifestyle situation. I have long questioned the allocation of time for school. After writing a particular assignment on schools negative effects to a quality life, I received a few arguments from the professor. She stated that there are things you learn in school, so it can not be a complete waste of time. I agree. There are a few things. Reading, writing, basic math, although I believe there are a few schools that don’t even do that. Anyways, my annoyance with the time spent on schooling is the amount of time wasted, not on the small amount of time spent doing something worthwhile.

When I obtained my degree, I had a job in the same career as my classes. The amount of worthwhile material I learned through the years, could have been taught in a week. The other skills, public speaking, organization, team building etc. were not developed in the classroom. I got a little practice, but the skills I have are from my own efforts outside of class. If I had not personally pushed myself, I wouldn’t have these skills.

I understand the historical use for school. When something called the internet didn’t exist. People didn’t have access to information, they couldn’t walk into a new career field, or learn a new language. That was the service school provided, but it has become obsolete.

“According to experts, the Internet and wealth of developing technology provide young people outside of education with a sense of “openness, connectedness, personalization, and participation” that is simply not found at the university level today. Those experts indicate that for America to move forward, higher education will need to better align itself with the rest of society.”

Take the Harvard student, the most important thing he learned in order to successfully run a business, was from his days working at a burger joint. The rest of the materials were easily available to learn on his own. This is what people can do nowadays. School simply takes a longer, less personal, and more costly approach (and by longer I mean 20-30 years). Most students also have knowledge in their career field. I had experience in mine, and knew most of the common knowledge topics being discussed. Then there were classes on things that don’t apply, you’ll never use, and could be summed up in 5 minutes. Yet hours and hours, and months and years and years are spent on an outdated service.

I don’t remember much from lectures, but I remember this funny clip from class. Watch below for a helpful illustration of my point.

Good Luck out there

Harvard Magazine – Nonstop: Today’s superhero undergraduates do “3,000 things at 150 percent.”
Survival of Higher Education

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Fudge Chocolate Topping


I was experimenting with fudge, but this came out to be more of a topper. I think it would work great with fruit or ice cream. You can also substitute the milk for something non-dairy if your lactose intolerant. It’s pretty rich, calorie wise too, so have it in smaller portions. I believe it’s gluten free as well, but double check and make sure the ingredients work for you.

3 tablespoons butter
3 tablespoons milk
2/3 cup coconut sugar
9 tablespoons cacao powder
3 tablespoons coconut oil
1 cup ricemellow cream

Heat butter, sugar, and milk to a boil. Boil for 30 seconds. Stir constantly, it burns easy. Add cacao powder and coconut oil. Stir a few minutes till melted and smooth (on low heat if necessary). Take off heat and stir in Ricemellow cream till the mixture is the same consistency throughout.

Chocolate (cacao), is also a great dessert to have because of it’s health benefits. It is one of the foods with the highest levels of antioxidants. Of course, the darker the better, so cutting back on sugar ups the nutritional value. Antioxidants remove free radicals, a great illustration of this is below.

“Here is a freshly cut apple for you (it’s so cute, isn’t it?)…


Now look what happens when you leave it out for a while (not so cute anymore)…


The rotting taking place in these pictures is free radicals at work (“oxidation” is the technical term). Now picture this type of rotting taking place inside your body. Imagine it affecting your brain, immune system, heart and other major organs. This type of excessive free radical activity in your body is the start to a slippery slope of bad health and disease.”

On top of keeping your body healthy, cacao can also boost your mood.

“Cacao contains a number of minerals and nutrients that serve as antioxidants. An extensive list of antioxidants contained in raw cacao includes anandamide, a neurotransmitter that triggers the feeling of bliss; phenethylamine (PEA), which produces the love sensation; sitosterol, which reduces LDL cholesterol; asparaginase, an enzyme that has anti-leukemia properties; dopamine, a neurotransmitter that boosts motivation and pleasure; and coumarin, a blood thinner. Raw cacao also contains epichatehins, chatechins, resveratrol and procyanidins, all which play a role in improving cardiovascular health.”

So, no harm in getting a little antioxidant boost. When I’m going solely for health benefits I’ll have raw chocolate cookies. You can use dates and honey instead of sugar as well. No matter your preference, they both taste great so I thought I’d share. Enjoy!

Good Luck out there

free radical affects
benefits of chocolate

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